Values and Conflict

Values refer to someone’s stable life goals, a reflection of what is most important to them. Values are established throughout one’s life as a result of accumulated life experiences (Lusk & Oliver, 1974; Rokeach, 1973). The values that are important to a person tend to affect the types of decisions they make, how they perceive their environment, their actual behaviors, and what conflicts they engage in.

A person is more likely to accept a job offer when the company possesses the values he or she cares about (Judge & Bretz, 1972; Ravlin & Meglino, 1987). Value attainment is one reason people will remain in a job. When a job does not help them attain their values, they are likely to leave their position (George & Jones, 1996).

For example, let’s say your top 4 core values are Family, Connection, Curiosity, and Adventure.  When something gets in the way of  living those values (think of your values as goals) conflict will likely occur. If a boss  expects someone to work overtime at the last minute when the employee has already made plans with their family, the employee will need to manage the potential conflict with their boss. Since the employee knows their top values, which has nothing to do with Success in terms of their career, the employee can express to their boss that Family is their number one life value.  Therefore, the employee won’t work overtime at that moment due to prior family commitments.  Then the employee should  explore other ways to help their boss and their team.

Understanding your values is an important step to understanding the conflict you experience in your life. Often, conflicts that are directly connected to your core values are the conflicts that are the most intense and cause us the most stress. Below is a short list of potential core values.  Consider which ones resonate the most for you.